I lost "control" and it scared me. A lot.

What a week.

On Sunday, I wasn't feeling well so Luke was feeding the kids dinner. I was trying to be in my room and watch TV and relax but I just felt so bad not helping out. I kept coming out of the room to see everyone, then going back in because I really just didn't feel good. At one point I came out just as Kaden was getting down from the table and was crying that his eyes hurt. He said he must have gotten peanut butter in them. (He had been eating celery with peanut butter, chicken enchilada pasta, and mango, and a sandwhich, i think... he eats a lot!) Luke wiped his eyes and bit and sent Kaden to me. I took a look and since they were watery and looking kind of (but barely) swollen I did a saline rinse on them. I told him not to touch them and headed back to my room. About a minute later, for some reason I came back out again and Luke told me to look at Kaden's eyes again. This time they were definitely swollen, but still nothing to freak out about. For some reason, I did though. I felt so dumb. I gave him a dose of benedryl, then Kaden sat on the step and started coughing and, for some unknown reason, I couldn't handle it. I asked Luke (more demanded) to take him to the ER, even if they just sat outside until we knew he was ok. I knew that coughing can be a sign of trouble breathing, but he had a little cold so I knew it probably wasn't. I knew I was being paranoid, and ridiculous, and all those other things.

Luke left with strict instructions to call me when they got there. I called a friend and told her what was going on and that I was freaked out, but not sure why. At some point I looked at the phone. It had been 7 minutes. It doesn't take 7 minutes to get to the hospital!!! I freaked! I called Luke and found out that by the time he got there Kaden's eyes were completely swollen. Even the whites of his eyes had swollen around the colored part. He had taken him into the ER and by the time they got inside his eyes were basically swollen shut. When I was talking to him they were already getting a IV line in, epinephrine pushed, and of course, steroids. He couldn't talk long...

Fast forward a few minutes and Luke calls me back. This time I can hear Kaden crying in the background and my heart was broken. He told me that Kaden had thrown up when they gave him the epinephrine and that he was looking pretty bad and very very uncomfortable. His whole face was swollen, and they weren't sure if his breathing was affected or not. He wasn't responding as well to the medicines as they had hoped but was doing fine. They had moved him to a bigger room in the ER, and the doctor had informed Luke that Kaden would be admitted and kept overnight. Oddly, that was a relief.

A couple friends came over to watch my kids, but I had to stick around long enough to get the other 2 kids to bed (including feeding Kamden). At that point, I got another call letting me know that Kaden would be sent to the ICU so that he would be monitored more closely. I can't describe the feeling that goes through you when you find out that your baby is going to be in the ICU. It was all so very unreal. When I finally got Kamden to bed and calmed enough that I could leave (they wouldn't let me bring any kids with  me) I went straight to see my boy.

I only spent about 2 hours with him up in the ICU, and he looked so bad. So so bad. But he was much better than he had been, and I think I'm thankful that I didn't see him at his worst. I don't know if this momma's heart could handle that. I hugged him and kissed him and wanted to cry...but was so happy that he was going to be ok. At this point he had  I also got to talk to the pediatrician for quite a while. We narrowed down his reaction to either peanut butter, mango or green chilis and will have to do testing later to find out for sure.

Later I found out that the "bigger room" they moved him to in the ER was the trauma (or surgery) room... the on-call surgeon was called in, and the nurses didn't leave his room even for a second. They kept calm, but it's apparent that they were not so sure they weren't going to need to trach him. Also found out later that he had been asking for mom... I'm so glad I didn't know that the whole time.

Kaden was a trooper the whole time. He cried some and was grumpy up in the ICU (well, it was like 3 1/2 hours past his bedtime and I'm sure he felt awful, not to mention the amount of drugs: epinephrine, zyrtec, benedryl (2 doses), zantac, prednisone, etc... I don't even know if I know all of the drugs he was on.) He wanted to watch Cars 2-which we let him- and then, at midnight, only agreed to try to sleep when I told him that even in the hospital there was a bedtime and that the nurse and doctor were there to tell him goodnight (narrowly escaped a meltdown with that one, i think!)

I came home and slept for about 3 hours .. I kept repeating the words to the kids' song: "I will cast all of my cares upon You, I will lay all of my burdens down at your feet, and anytime that I don't know what to do, I will cast all of my cares upon You." to finally get to sleep (also Kate and Kamden had a ROUGH night- I think they could sense the stress and commotion). As soon as we could in the morning we headed back to the hospital (this time I could bring Kate and Kamden) to see Kaden. Kate brought him his favorite stuffed animals and it was so sweet to see the excitement of them seeing each other. I know that Kate knew that something had happened and she was so excited to see her brother.

Kaden got out of the hospital a little before noon and insisted that we go to his friend Noah's house to play. (That is where Kate had gone earlier in the morning after she got bored of laying in bed with Kaden.) As far as he was concerned life was back to normal (and he never wants to stay at a hospital again!!!)

On this side of it, it's been hard. I can't speak for Luke, but for me every day and every moment has been an exersize at trusting God with my boy (kids, really). Reminding myself that God gave him to me, and God can take him at any point and my job is to praise him. Making a point to put worry and fear aside so that my 4 year old can be as normal as possible while we figure this out. And hard to know the balance of what to say to Kaden. We've tried to let him know how very important it is that he avoid certain foods and say no if he's offered them (anything peanuts and any sucker, candy, juice that could have mango flavors..just to name a few). The next morning he asked for peanut butter on his toast and when I told him no, he cried, "But I just like peanut butter SO much." We've tried to help him understand that this is a life-threatening thing for him, while not causing him to live in fear. Helping him to take on this life change and responsibility (since I can't be around him all the time) as a big boy, while still letting him be a kid. And we know that at 4 years old there is no way he can truly understand...

It's been hard too at every meal for Luke and I. We are overly cautious and paranoid. I haven't given him a strawberry even though I have some in the fridge because I know they are such a common allergy food... even though I know that wasn't what caused the reaction. I remind myself that life will go back to "normal" and that this "trauma" will fade into the past. We will grow accustomed to sending an epi-pen with him everywhere he goes, and asking friends to remember too, when he's with them. But for now, I'm remembering to treasure every moment with my kids, and purposefully reminding myself that I am not in control, and Who holds the control.

I truly believe that God placed that instinct into me to send him to the ER and that God spared him from worse reaction because of that. I did see God's hand at work throughout the process.

He has his first allergy testing appointment on Monday. While I'm a little nervous, I'm excited to be able to find out which thing he is allergic to so we can give him back a few of his comforts! Poor guy had to give up a lot of yummy things! He goes off his steroids on Sunday and I'm also super excited for that. Did you know that steroids make a boy aggressive, hyper and HUNGRY? it's a scary combo.

I mostly wrote this for myself... and for Kaden. I want him to be able to know someday exactly what happened (even though even my mind is foggy about it just a few days later) just in case he thinks he should try that food again.. and to remember for myself, just in case I start to take my kids for granted. We think we have this life under control and it's good to remember that we don't. That in just a second, in the blink of an eye, our whole world can change. And I'm so thankful that, for us, the change is just an allergy to avoid.

for future reminiscing

Kadenisms:
"blizzard" = blister, as in "I have a blizzard on my finger"
"go dead" "went dead" = died or killing someone, as in "Katelyn, you go dead when I stab you"

He's into legos, drawing pictures (and cutting) for anyone and everyone, and "weapons." The exciting news for him this year is that he is registered for kindergarten. WOW! His screening is next week. (I guess I better get that in the calendar!)

Katelynisms:
Dandan = Kamden
Dayday = Kaden
Date = Kate
"die" = cry, as in "I didn't die!" or "Dandan's dying!"
"yike" = like, as in "I don't yike it!"
"me-me" = excuse me
"hing more hong" = sing more songs (we hear this one a LOT)
"deedee" = blankee, as in "MY DEEDEE!" in desparation as she realizes it's not RIGHT next to her anymore.
"Rellie" = Cinderella
"toot toot" = cute cute = her skirt most of the time, but any dress that she thinks is pretty
"Yut" = what, as in "Yut mom?"
"Dummin" = coming, as in "I'm dummin"
"ngulk" = milk
"yah you" = I love you
"pah-ee" =potty
"hoop" = soup
"no no" = don't know
I should note: she says Mickey Mouse perfectly. He should be proud.

Her big news is that she is learning to "not die" (not cry) in the nursery. It's a struggle for her and when she successfully enters a nursery without crying she announces it to everyone: "I DIDN'T DIE!!!" I just love it.

Kamden:
6 months old! Almost to the day he learned to sit, and does it well! He doesn't like baby food..at all. Not hot, not cold, not somewhere in between. He doesn't like green beans, peaches or sweet potatoes, not with rice or oatmeal added. He doesn't like it. (not in the rain, not on a train, not with a fox, not in a box...etc...) He sucks his bottom lip up and under his top gums and then puts his upper lip down over it. Just try getting a spoon in there. And when you do manage to get a spoon in he will spit it at you violently or arch his back and cry. He does.not.like.food.  He will take a bottle of breastmilk IF you get it the right temperature, and let me assure you..that temperature is not an easy one to hit. (I think he changes it... keeps me guessing.) If this kid weens before age 1 after all this trauma we've gone through, let's just say I will not be impressed! I am, however, impressed with his ability to resist food. He is a social little guy, and hates being left in the other room, even if surrounded by a pile of the funnest toys ever. Or in a bouncer, or anywhere. He loves to be held and smiled at and played with. He basically thinks all my time should be spent with him. I agree, until I look around at the shambles that is my house and other 2 kids! He sleeps well at night, usually goes down between 6:30pm and 7:30pm ...I wake him at 9:30pm to feed him then he sleeps from about 10pm to 6am. Although this morning he slept til 7am. I could get used to that! He has been on reflux meds since the beginning of January and it really seems to help his cough. I also cut out as much dairy as I can and taht has been the biggest help of all, it seems! I am so thankful to not have to try the asthma meds since this seems to be working. All in all, he's such a great little addition to our family, and keeps us on our toes!

Babies really don't keep

My Kamden turns 6 months tomorrow. This week I keep reminding myself of that. SIX months! He's no longer on the uphill slope to 1. He's closer to 1 than he is to birth. On this day last year, very few people even knew that I was pregnant. It's crazy to think that here I am, one year later, with a little boy who smiles and giggles and kisses and screeches...all on purpose. I am blessed. My goal when he was born (as with both of the other kids) was to enjoy him fully. I feel like I get better at this with each baby. Maybe because with each baby I learn again that, like that poem says, "Babies don't keep." I've truly enjoyed this first 6 months of Kamden's life. I feel like he is the fussiest baby and yet I have handled his "fussies" better than I did with the other 2. I can truly say I've enjoyed this little boy to the fullest. and I'm a little sad that "babies don't keep"...so while he's still just 6 months old, I pledge to rock him when he lets me, snuggle him when he snuggles, and cherish every baby slobber kiss, hug, and smile. And when it's tempting to say "I can't wait til you can..." to remember that I really don't wish he'd grow up any faster than he is...even during his fussy 3 hours of the day. I'll take them. Mother, O' Mother, come shake out your cloth, Empty the dustpan, poison the moth. Hang out the washing, make up the bed, Sew on a button and butter the bread. Where is the mother whose house is so shocking? She's up in the nursery, blissfully rocking. Oh, I've grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue, Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo. Dishes are waiting and bills are past due, Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek - peekaboo. The shopping's not done and there's nothing for stew, And out in the yard there's a hullabaloo. But I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo. Look! Aren't his eyes the most wonderful hue? Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo. The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow, But children grow up, as I've learned to my sorrow. So quiet down cobwebs; Dust go to sleep! I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep. ~ Ruth Hulbert Hamilton

Laundry room Re-do.

I'm blogging this so I don't forget my inspiration.

Our wash machine went out this week...during the middle of hubby and 2 kids puking sick as well as the ever present 3 month old laundry... not.good.

Before I move on..let me show you why a broken wash machine results in a complete laundry room makeover. Words just don't do justice.

But first, a confession: I teach my son's preschool co-op tomorrow. And I should be prepping for that. But now that I've confessed I feel that it is ok to keep going with the blog instead. So...without further adieu....

Please notice where the dryer vent attaches to the wall. Because, obviously, you should make it go through the wall where EVERYONE will see it, instead of down low where a dryer actually sits. This will change.

These doors are metal, on a track that is caked with dirtiness, and they barely slide. And they are horrendously ugly, in case the picture doesn't show you that.

As if my laundry room isn't bad enough, you walk through the teeny laundry room, to an equally teeny guest bathroom. Because, of course, if you have a teeny amount of space you should definitely make 2 SEPARATE teeny rooms out of it. It just makes sense. Which is why we bought this house. Because..well.. ok. Sometimes I do wonder... but I digress.

In this picture, if you look reaaaaally closely, you can see a small hole in the wall behind the toilet. That's from our kitchen/dining redo which you can look at here . I'm not gonna lie... a room re-do is never as perfect as those other blogs want you to think... this particular "not easy" was a fridge leak. Also, notice the lack of paint color, or wallpaper on the walls... here is why:

(Please let me know when you are done gagging so we can move on.)(By the way...this paper came off within a few months of moving in... 4 years ago. And is still off. And "still off" is still better than the original wallpaper on!)

Last but not least... the flooring. There.are.no.words.

Now that I have officially drawn you in by the pure disgustingness that is my laundry/guest bathroom... let me invite you into my ideas. Then, when it's done (in 2 years) I will share the "done" photos and see how close we came. Ready? Ok!

We will begin by tearing out the wall between the bathroom and laundry rooms. This scares me for two reasons. 1. We have never torn out walls before. 2. The rooms are not even. The back of the laundry room is about 6 inches deeper than the bathroom. I do wonder how this is going to "flow" but my hubby assures me it will be ok.

Next we will replace ugly flooring. I have no picture of it, because I haven't actually chosen the exact flooring, but I do know it will be the new waterproof vinyl. It's expensive, but worth it in a room centered around water and leakage concerns.

Now..here's the exciting stuff.. since our laundry room does not actually have a door on it (and we are taking out the bathroom door) I have been stumped as to what to do. I don't want to put a door in for two reasons. 1. I think it will make the family room that is outside of the laundry room seem more crowded and blah. 2. We would have to frame in a door..which means mud/tape/mess in my family room. not just the laundry room. this, to me, is overwhelming. Thank goodness for pinterest:

We have the space for this..and I love it.. annnnnd my hubby can make it. (he just loves my projects....) I haven't decided color yet..but am strongly considering red washer/dryer and red doors/walls... you can let me know what you think in the comments..but only if you promise to read the rest of this blog first.

Next, remember those ugly doors in front of my furnace? Here's the solution:

VOILA! Love. I probably won't do chalkboard (I know, it's the "thing" right now, but it won't always be...) I will consider making them magnetic... so then I can do this idea on it:

But, that is still to be decided. Plus, with a new wash machine, I won't NEED this idea. My current one eats socks. Don't believe me? It spits them back out about 2 weeks later when it eats another. It leaves black chew marks on them. Truth be told, it's probably the socks that choked the thing to death. I want to take it apart to see... I'm not kidding. It.eats.my.socks. And you always blamed a dryer.. check you washer!!!

As for those walls..and that hole in the wall...here is my inspiration to keep with the theme of wood barnish doors and small spaces:

Again, I'm *considering* red. But that is still very, VERY, up in the air. (I'm NOT a red person. I actually can't believe I'm even considering red. I think the real truth is I just have no idea WHAT color to do. So I throw out red. Hey, I have a green bedroom, orange dining room...why not a red laundry room?) I just love this idea. I borderline ADORE this idea. Also, where that hole is we could put a nice little hatched door so we can get to the water pipes without another hole someday. I know, genious, right? We did that behind our fridge too... again..digressing.

Then comes the expensive part...the shelving, machines, sink, etc.. and I love this one.

I do think we will do white for the cabinets... with, of course, some fun hardware... My tall cabinet won't be able to be quite as wide, I don't think. But still, I hope to fit all my towels and sheets in there instead of in my son's closet. The sink will be a tasteful mix between bathroom sink and utility sink. The toilet will stay where it is at the end of the sink. I just love the idea of a big long countertop to fold laundry on and that flows right into the sink. We do have a corner shower that is opposite the toilet that we will also need to replace, but that was kind of boring.

Another of my favorite parts was this find:

In case you can't see it well, it is a ceiling drying rack on a pulley. You can lower it to hang the clothes on, then raise it out of the way. I air dry a LOT of clothes (as you can tell in previous pictures) and this is a small laundry room miracle. I got almost giddy when I found this gem. My hubby- the engineer- doesn't like how it is made and wants me to let him make one. I think by the time he's done making everything else, he'll be happy to let me just buy this. Tee hee.

So there you go! That's my inspiration! I do think my hubby hates pinterest. It wasn't around when we did the dining room. I searched google images... and then saved ONE picture to my computer. ONE. I do love the turnout...but man, I love pinterest. I have no fewer than TWENTY-SEVEN saved laundry room ideas. He just shakes his head. At least I've narrowed it down to these, right?

And while I was writing this blog, these were baking. Mmmmm!

Double Chocolate Pomegranite yumminess. Anything to avoid what I should be doing.

Life... a long "nutshell" of what's been going on.

Almost 7 weeks have passed since my precious youngest boy was born. My how time has flown! I have enjoyed every single snuggle, and made a point to remember them. He is growing so fast. In fact, last night, as far as I know, he slept through the night (10pm-5am)!!! If he didn't, I didn't know. He is growing like Kaden did.. FAST and furious! Can I just say I am in love with my little family? (Some would say 5 is not little. I feel it is little. Just sayin'.) Kaden and Kate have adjusted to Kamden so well. Never once have I seen even a hint of dislike, jealousy, or meanness. Kaden has loved to hold him from day 1. It can be so helpful if Kamden just wants held and I have something I need to do. I can usually buy about 5 minutes with Kaden holding him. Kate isn't as "into" holding him, but she loves him just as much. She adores rocking him in the swing and giving him kisses. She still refuses to try to say his name. He is "baby" to her. Kamden fits in so well. I would say for the most part he is an easy going baby (however, when hungry, he will not be pacified!). He likes to be held to sleep during the day (I blame company for the first 4 weeks of his life!) but sleeps well in the bassinet in the night. (As I type, however, he is sleeping well, in the daytime, in his bassinet...so I am hoping this is a good sign!) He has just in the last few days gone to, what I would call a real schedule. Eats around 7 or 8am, then at 10:30am, 1:30pm 4:30pm, 6:30pm and 9:30pm..and sometime in the night...lately, 4am-5am. I love it! His "grouchy" times are between 4:30 and 7pm when he usually goes "to bed"...it does make dinnertime a struggle, but as my third, I remember this is a phase. And I can handle it! Kamden started smiling at 6 weeks old! He definitely reserves them for special moments. The first one I caught on camera was him looking in the mirror where his changing table is. The next night I was holding him and I would say "Kamden, where's your daddy?" And Luke would say "Hi Kamden" and he'd arch his back and turn his head to see his daddy who was behind him, and grin. Melted Daddy's heart! He smiles 10x more for Luke than anyone else at this point! Kaden started "preschool" in the beginning of October. It is more of a co-op with 2 of my friends wiht boys Kaden's age. We rotate teaching/houses and have 2 1/2 hours of preschool on Tuesday and Friday mornings. We are working out the kinks, but have settled on focusing on learning letters/sounds (they all know the sounds fairly well already) and writing the capital letter. They are all at different levels...Kaden definitely needs to work on writing his letters, where one of the other boys is already very good at writing and controlling his pencil. It makes it a challenge to keep them all learning what THEY need to learn and working on the things they each need to work on. It has been SO good for my boy. He sees the other 2 working hard and wants to do the same (when I tried to teach him at home he just didn't want to, or got discouraged quickly). They have a bit of playtime during that time to (whatcha gonna do when we all have younger ones to tend to as we "teach") and overall it is just a blessing. This means that 2 out of every 3 preschools I get to drop Kaden off and run errands or do housework with just Kate and Kamden. Who knew that would be easier??? Also, to update on Kaden's arm (which he "broke" the day before kamden was born and was in a cast for 2 weeks.) He had his 2 week xray and they discovered it was not broken after all. (They did know this was a possibility, as the kind of break it appeared to be can only be diagnosed after healing occurs or doesn't occur, as was this case.) He had just sprained it good. So he is cast free for 4 weeks now... dare I say it??? Katelyn began limping sometime back in May-ish. It was just randomly, but by August had become almost constant. I finally took her to see the Family Doctor in mid-September and was referred to a Pediatric Orthopedic Surgeon with concerns that one leg was shorter than the other. She also ended up with a referral to the ENT for her tonsils because she had a fever and big tonsils. We have gone to both surgeons. Her leg is fine, (PRAISE the Lord!) and we just have to watch it to see if she is ever in pain, etc... but wouldn't you know it, her limp dissapeared the day of the appointment. I could swear this kid does things by the "power of suggestion." But, at least our minds were at ease! Her tonsils are another story. She has had large (touching) tonsils since January. The ENT confirmed that although her tonsils are not "diseased" or unhealthy, she will never "grow into" them. They will eventually become a problem, either by causing sickness or sleeping/snoring/breathing problems. We elected to go ahead and have them removed now while she is young, before the problems come, and while our deductible is met. It helps to have been through this with Kaden (AFTER his caused many problems) and we know what to expect. Her surgery is this next Friday (Oct.26th). We are looking forward to I am praying htat all we have to face next year are "well child" checks! In other news, Kate is talking very, very well! We might be the only ones who can understand her, but we'll take it! She talks as if she can say every word she wants, and we understand a lot of it...unless she's lecturing, and then it's just a bunch of jibberish...until the "NO NO Deh-deh (Kaden)". She is very convincing with her lectures, even if we don't understand a word. We will try to video her talking here soon before her surgery so we can hear if her voice changes as drastically as Kaden's did! We have been helping her memorize a Bible verse with her Sunday School class. It is "God made me." When I first helped her with it, she must have thought that since I was the one saying it: "God made me" that she should say "God made Mommy." A-DOR-A-BLE. Now she says "God made MOMMY! and daddy, and Deh-deh (Kaden) and BABY!" One day I asked her to say her verse and she got a gleam in her eye: "Goooooo.... Maaaaaaae(she doesn't say the "d)......POOP!" she was so thrilled with herself for making such a funny joke. Oh.my. Her brother has rubbed off! Currently she is attempting to give up naps. As I type it is 3:15pm and she has not gone to sleep in the 2 hours she's been in there. This momma is NOT okay with this!!! Well that gets you up to date with the kiddos..so much goes on I can't keep up. In the last 5 months we have AVERAGED 2 dr appts (including xrays, well child, OB, etc) a week. A WEEK, people. Also, we will have checked into the hospital every month for 5 months after her surgery next week. If nothing else, we will remember this year! Here's to hoping for a splendid WELL Nov-Dec! As for me, I'm feeling GREAT. I had my 6 week OB check and checked out fine. I STILL have not wrapped my mind around the fact that Kamden is HERE and it was that easy. I was blessed with this delivery in so many ways. I started a diet one week ago today. I had lost all but about 3lbs of my pregnancy weight gain, and as of today have lost 4lbs. Hurray for being back to pre-pregnancy. Now, I am hoping to get to pre-pre-pre-pregancy (AKA before kids)... on step at a time. I have gone about my "diet" a different way this time, and I know I can be successful. I am NOT giving up my coffee. Not one ounce of it. And I am not giving up any of the stuff I like in my coffee. Although, today I bought a sugar/stevia blend to see if I liked it as much as sugar. I then *had* to have a 2nd cup of coffee to try it. So far, I loved it! I made the mistake of trying a different creamer on the same cup (which I also liked), it would have been smart to try one at a time. I also am trying to eat more like 5 times a day instead of just 3. I start out with my (horrendously good) coffee (horrendous in diet speak, and good in non-diet speak) and a yogurt. About half the time I miss the yogurt (such is life with 3, I suppose.) Then around 10am I have a snack. If i missed my yogurt I throw that in too. My snack is usually a fruit. Banana, or apple/peanut butter are my favorites. For lunch I try to have a salad or extremely healthy something. My salads always include a hard-boiled egg and either a slice of lunchmeat (ham or turkey) or chicken if I have leftovers. Then, of course, lots of veggies. I have a few lower-fat dressings or go sparingly on the good stuff (like ranch or honey mustard)! For my afternoon snack I have some pretzels and a cheese stick, or a thin bun with Laughing Cow cheese (um. yum.) or something more carbish (altho sometimes I switch those snacks around.) For dinner I just make a normal dinner for the family (last night was Hamburger Helper...maybe not normal, but you get the idea, definitely not "diet" food) and eat it sparingly. Maybe I shouldn't say sparingly..I just eat a healthy portion, and if I'm still hungry go for the veggies. After about 3 days of this routine (and feeling like my stomach was stuck to my ribs) I am no longer hungry at all. I often forget at least one snack, and feel very satisfied. If I get the evening munchies I'll eat my forgotten snack, or if I've eaten all day and still feel hungry I will eat air-popped popcorn with cheddar seasoning salt on it. That is filling! So far I feel so good and like I could eat like this forever. Some of my favorite diet discovery foods so far (as far as healthy, GOOD CHOICES) are: Tuna mixed with 1% cottage cheese and eaten as dip for pretzels Thin Bun toasted with a package of Laughing Cow cheese spread between as a sandwhich. Popcorn with seasoning salt Apples with peanut butter. Cottage cheese (1%) mixed with ranch dressing mix as a dressing for salad (cheese and ranch, yes!) I am avoiding buying things advertised as "low fat" as I see that many of them just have artificial flavoring which can't be any better than sugar (in my opinion). However, I have always done reduce fat sour cream, and 1 or 2% cottage cheese and skim milk. Some things just make sense! Luke's busy this month with his work project "wrapping up" (that usually takes 1-2 months, so i'm not sure that "wrapping up" is an honest term for hit.) It means they do a lot of paving, pouring, and other things that keep him on the job site longer, miss lunches and sometimes dinners (as was the case last night) and causes overtime. We have had a good summer though, with him only having to work a few Saturdays (as the case is tomorrow). He's tired, but doing well. Welp. That's it. I will try, try, try, to update more, for my own sake if nothing else!

Just for some perspective...

The first picture he's a few days old and about 6.5lbs. The second picture he is 6 weeks old and about 13lbs. (and it's as close to a smile as we've captured yet)

Kamden Daniel...in like a lamb, out like a Kanon

We woke up Saturday (the 1st) to a normal Saturday. I was still having contractions every 15-30 minutes and had basically just gotten used to it. It was barely different from my pre-term labor, except a little more painful. A friend had offered to cut/color my hair (ironically, the last time she had cut/colored it, was the day I found out I was pregnant)(I know, I should get my hair done more, but that wasn't the point.) So anyway, I went and did that, after starting a ham in the crock pot. After the haircut/color I headed to McDonalds, because for some reason I just couldn't get a greasy burger out of my head (and Burger King was WAY busy.) Then headed home, did some laundry, went to Walmart and Smiths...you know. Typical day. Obviously these contractions were nothing to stop me... just maybe annoying. (Not going to lie... I was starting to feel like "ok, if this isn't going to turn into something then i could really handle it if they'd stop!") So, just to brag... let me recap. On the day I was in labor and had Kamden I went grocery shopping, made a ham dinner, and got my hair done. I'm that awesome. ;) At 7:30ish I went in to lay down while Luke put the kids to bed. When Luke came in the room after kids were in bed I said "Man, these contractions are really feeling strong, but still not regular." That's when he told me that when the kids went to bed, Luke took Kaden downstairs to bed and prayed with him. Kaden's prayer: "Dear Jesus, please let momma have the baby tonight." (is that not sooo sweet?) It was about an hour later, when I was SO sick of random, somewhat painful (gaining momentum in the ouch department, but still extremely irregular) that I decided "I want to KNOW if this is doing anything at all." I just wanted to know if I should have hope, or not! Now, doctors always say to wait til the contractions are 5 minutes apart for an hour to come...but we called the hospital and they said come just in case. So we called a friend to come watch the kids (THANKS BRENT AND CLAIRE) and arrived at the ER (since it was after hours) entrance at 9:30PM. Side story: In the ER there was a young girl with a young 10 day old baby. After I checked in we had to wait for a security guard to escort us to OB... so this girl decided she needed to be miss chatty and asked if I was inducing. No. So then she decided that I needed to know how to have a baby. She assured me that I would need an epidural and that it would be my best friend. She warned me it might make me throw up, because that's what it did to her. Oh and she named her baby Zaidon because she couldn't have a popular name. And then her mom joined in to tell again how much I really needed to get an epidural. I was trying so hard to be a good listener...but I really couldn't care less what they thought. Finally, as a strong contraction hit, I turned and asked if the security guard was here yet... and that's when I heard the mom and daughter say to each other "OH, I THINK SHE'S IN LABOR!" (um... what DID you think I was there for if I was not inducing?) Anyway...the guard went to take us up and then realized she had to have the ER receptionist open a door for us. (At this point I was wondering how someone who works nights could NOT know that?? And was a little annoyed. This night was not starting well...not how I hoped labor would go!) ANYWAY. By the time I was checked in and up to my room (not a delivery room)around 10pm I soon realized this was the real thing.Partly because it felt like my water was leaking, but mostly because the contractions were so painful I couldn't talk through them anymore.This was what they say you should have for an hour before going in. My contractions were still about 7 minutes apart, but when she checked me she said "You're not going home tonight." (It's that moment. The one you hope for and dread. You want the baby out...but the labor/delivery?????) I was a 5.5, so nothing crazy or exciting. When she asked if I wanted an epidural, I was ready to say YES. I'm not sure why but when she told me that I was a 5.5 I suddenly realized that with Kate I had gone from a 5 to a 10 in about 1/2 hour. So I mentioned it to the nurse, all the while thinking "She won't believe me" and "why would I think it'll go like that without an epidural?" But she did believe me and kicked into high gear. Within a few minutes she was ready to move me to a delivery room, but I was in so much pain I realized I needed a wheelchair. (Never thought that would be me!) By the time we got to the delivery room and up on the bed I was shaking. Luke asked if I was cold, but I wasn't. I heard the nurse say to anther nurse "She's presenting signs of transistion!" (which means you are about 8cm). Sure enough she checked me and I was a good 7.5cm. I kept telling them I might be wrong about how fast it might go, but they stepped it into even higher gear to get the room totally ready. At that point they called the doctor, and started begging me to wait til he got there to deliver. I told them I trusted them completely to deliver, and if I needed to push...i WOULD push. It was 10:30 (only 1/2 hour to go from a 5-10!!!) At some point in those 30 minutes I realized there would be NO time for an epidural and that was the biggest mental block for me to get through. After I got to an 8 and the pain was more pressure than contractions I realized the epidural had never helped that part anyway-it felt exactly the same. I had just THOUGHT it'd be 10 times worse. The doctor made it on time, much to the nurse's relief) and after maybe 7-10 pushes he was born! While I was pushing the doctor had told me that he could see hair. At that point, I was convinced it was a BOY (if I hadn't been convinced before!) So when he was born the doctor had to remind me to look and see what he was! I was SO sure... It definitely makes me laugh to remember the doctor saying "Are you going to look to see what it is?" and my inward realization that I really didn't KNOW, and I better look! It was a fun surprise, even if I wasn't very surprised! He was born at 11:03PM (Only one hour after I even realized I was having a baby that night!...I remember saying to Luke at 10:30pm "Do you think we'll have a Sept 1 or 2nd baby? I laugh now, at the thought.) Kamden Daniel was 7lb 2oz and was 19.5inches long. Except it would be a full 24 hours before we named him that! We struggled between Kamden and Kannon. Afterall, he came into this world like a Cannon (hense the title of the blog)...And we struggled between Daniel and Truth for his middle name. Somehow we named him. I couldn't tell you how... but we love it and it fits him! We are so blessed. And he has been a super easy baby so far. Except maybe the run to the walk-in at 13 days old... but that's a story for another time.

more "normal" life for us...

I think in the last 3 days we did more than a normal (busy) week! First, last Thursday (Aug 30th) Kaden had his last x-rays of his arm and was given the go-ahead to go without his splint/cast. Can you say HAPPY BOY??? He was so excited, and I'm not gonna lie, I was too! On Friday (31st), we went to a friend's house before my OB appointment to play. The kids were riding bikes outside on the somewhat sloped driveway (more sloped than ours) and suddenly we heard a scream. I wasn't sure immediately if the scream was a happy squeal or a bad scream...it didn't help that I was sitting at the top of the driveway and the scream came from the bottom- behind our van. Pretty soon, as I got up to go check, I saw Kaden coming toward me silent from a lack of air... he was hysterical. From that point on he held his arm (same arm) and cried off and on. I debated: was this real? Did it just scare him since the cast was off? etc... and I couldn't do much because by the time I had him calmed down it was time for me to go to my OB appointment. So i headed to that, leaving the kids with my friend (thank you Lauren!) and was informed that I had not grown bigger, gained weight etc, and so they needed to do an ultrasound and if there were low fluids we would be inducing. Also, the Dr went ahead and stripped my membranes and told me I was a good 3 and almost fully effaced. I was a little nervous. I hadn't told them I had a kid back home with a possible broken arm and for the life of me couldn't figure out how I would be induced AND get his arm checked out. Thankfully the ultrasound showed my fluids to be a 7.5. If it had been a 7 we would have been sent to the hospital to induce! I was relieved. Meanwhile, Kaden was still babying his arm, so I made an appointment with his pediatrician (seeing as it was friday before a 3 day weekend, of course!). We knew she would send us to the hospital for xrays but wanted to avoid the wait of the ER. Luke came with me to the appointment because, being 38 weeks pregnant, I was not sure I would even be able to go help with the xrays. It turned out to be so good that Luke went (thank you Sherilyn for coming to stay with Kate for us!) because as brave as Kaden was and as hard as he tried to do what they wanted, there was one position that just hurt him soooo badly. He would become almost hysterical, but they HAD to have an x-ray... My heart hurt for him. But Luke was able to stay with him for each xray, and I wouldn't have been able to. side note: when we checked into the hospital for his x-rays, the lady checking us in did a total double take. She looked at the orders for x-rays, back to her screen and back to the orders and said, "Diiiiid....he just have x-rays yesterday?" Yes.. he did. They were for a better reason. She was totally amazed. Then when we got to the radiation wing the x-ray tech came to get us and was like "Hey buddy... didn't I just do x-rays on you?" Oh my. It was then that I started praying that no one turn us in to family services or something!! It is just so crazy. Also, I told Kaden he is not allowed to get popular at places like hospitals and jails! ANYWAY... Meanwhile, I start having contractions. Nothing big. Just more notice-able than normal. not too regular...not to painful...nothing crazy. Didn't think anything of them, except that they were there. We finally got all the x-rays needed (not as easy this time around, this break seemed to be a lot more painful than the last one) and were never actually TOLD his arm was broken, but were told that we needed to head down to the ER to get a splint. They almost made us check in down there, but thankfully they just treated him as an out-patient (the ER was FULL... we were glad to skip that wait.) By this time it was almost 5pm and he was tired of being at doctors, and hungry, and we weren't in much better moods. (Even though on the way home Luke commented to me that he was glad I was handling it all so well.. all I could do was laugh. It was just too crazy.)He ended up with a cast from his wrist to his underarm that is not removable this time. I'm just glad we are past the hottest time of year, for his sake. So that evening Kaden (while praying with Luke), before bed, prayed: "Dear Jesus, Please let Momma have the baby tomorrow, because she wants to. Amen." Sweetest prayer ever.... see next post for answer to his prayer :)

Wow, it's been a while. and the last post was barely considered a post. It was more like an "I got half way through and pooped out" kind of wanna-be post. Sometime around the end of July (27th-ish, maybe?) Kaden went back to the surgeon for more x-rays of his arm. I had hoped to be done, but instead we were sent up to Physical Therapy where they could make him a better cast. After an hour up there (and 2 little kids who were VERY ready to come home for lunch) we had a new "splint" for Kaden. We do like it better because he can use his arm, and it stays (no more re-doing ace wrap 16 times a day!). It can also get wet as long as we have time to let the strap dry out. (It straps around the trunk of his body.) When I have my computer back, I'll have to post some pictures. Anyway, he was sent home with an appointment for 3 weeks later. That is this Friday. Today i haven't even remembered to put on his cast, and yesterday I forgot to take it with us to the pool... I am pretty sure we just need to be DONE with this whole broken arm fiasco. Kaden is really sick of the splint, which makes it harder for me to want to make him wear it when it seems like after 7 weeks it should be good!! Katelyn has really begun to add words to her vocabulary. The latest are "towel" "bottle" (as in, her nalgene bottle,...as opposed to drinking out of ANYTHING else.) "drink" (WITH the K at the end, as opposed to whatever sound she used to make for that word) and many more. Of course, most of her words don't actually sound like the words, but I'm just happy to understand more and more! She went through a phase (a couple weeks long) where she wouldn't give Luke hugs or let him kiss her. If he did manage to kiss her she'd get mad and "wipe it off" violently! He was so sad. Now she can't give him enough hugs and he has to trick her to get out the door, basically. I tell him, this is a girl for you! Today I'm 36 weeks! I'm getting more and more ready to face labor, and meet this baby! I am sure enjoying the last few weeks of relaxing though. A few times now I've taken afternoon naps. I keep reminding myself that in 4 weeks this will all be different...I should probably start setting an alarm for every 2-3 hours just to remind myself what having a newborn is like!!!!! For now, I'll let myself enjoy the peace...and try to ignore this ginormous belly! The pool closes at the end of this week, so the last 2 weeks we've been trying to make use of it as much as possible. The kids love it. If I even show them their swim suits Kate is the first to throw her hands up (like touchdown) and yell "POOOOOOO!!!!!" (she hasn't quite mastered the L sound) and then it's all over... we BETTER be going to the pool. Today we didn't go because it's only in the 60s. Of course, next week, after it's closed, we're scheduled to be back in the mid 90s. I don't really feel like there is a lot more to post about. We have been keeping very busy, but not really doing anything of note. I'm so thankful that the month of August has been so much better than July. By the last day of July I was ready to throw up the white flag... it was filled with trial after trial. August has been a much needed "normal"! Oh, I have cleaned out most of the closets in the house, and our bedroom got painted, and we have been very productive lately. Now if i could just convince myself to mop the floor or finish Kate's scrapbook!

Kaden informed me today that "When I turn 5 I want a tractor on my cake" (holding up John Deere Tractor) "with a road" (we gotta get this kid to a farm...lol) "and this time could you cover the road so it doesn't dry out so we can eat it?" I just assured him we could probably do that if we remember. He is NOT impressed that when I covered the cake I didn't cover the road and it dried out...and that was my excuse for not letting him eat it.

We had Kaden's birthday party on Friday the 13th. That morning we took him to the surgeon for his arm. They took more xrays which showed that his arm had displaced slightly since the first xrays (don't know how you avoid that when they make him go 2 weeks without a cast). Also found out his break is up so high on his arm that he can't have a cast. Instead he has a make-shift splint that goes on the outside of his arm and gets ace-wrapped on around his body. In some ways it's nice because we can take it off to bathe him, or let him cool off in the pool, and let him have a break from it during movies. (Which is ironic since he broke his arm while watching a movie!) In other ways it's a pain because he knows it can come off and that we won't let him have it off every time he wants to, and because it takes 2 ace wraps to get it on right which is just plain hot in this 100 degree July weather! He's been a trooper though. He gets to have this on for 2 weeks, then go back for more xrays to see if we are good to let him go without. Anyway, back to the birthday. We just did a very small party with my parents (Gramma and Boppa, who had him the previous 5 days in Lewistown and brought him back to us) I wish I could post some pictures of his time with them, but my computer broke again, so I do not have them available. As you can see in the above picture, I made him a Cars themed cake this year and he loved it. He go tons of good stuff for his birthday, but his favorites were definitely the legos. He has played legos every day without fail since his birthday! He also loved the remote control loader, and the cars toys he got. We had his friend Cheyanne over along with Matt and Laura (her parents) for the evening. It was a small party, but very fun! Kadenisms: "I have LOTS of cousins, and uncles and aunts! But, i like to stomp on ants, but probably not ants like Auntie Rose ... she wouldn't like that." Watching lightning and hearing thunder..."Hope Daddy doesn't get thundered away!" Watching the UPS truck drive away: "Kate! That's the toy truck, but it didn't stop at our house today." (Apparently he distinctly remembers when they dropped of the water table for Kate's bday.) Kaden and Kate sitting at the table coloring/cutting. Kaden: "Kate, do you like your fingers?" Kate: "Noooo." (favorite word) Kaden: "MOM! Katelyn wants her fingers cut off with my scissors!" Mom: "When you are done with your fruit loops you can have something else, like fruit." Kaden: "Mom, the people at Walmart put fruit in the cereal, that's why it's FRUIT LOOPS. so we can just have more cereal." Kaden to 6 month pregnant Mom: Does your baby like chocolate milk? Mom: I guess so. Kaden: Did you drink chocolate milk when I was in your tummy? Mom: Yes, I did... Kaden: Yah, and I opened my mouth wide and tried to catch it! While Kaden was finishing up lunch he was watching Luke and I peel/slice potatoes and throw them into my large pot to boil for mashed potatoes...then he went down to play. Later as we were sitting at dinner Luke got up and got the same big pot (this time boiling corn) and drained it. Kaden saw the corn in the pot and got the biggest look of pure amazement and exclaimed, "MOM! you made corn out of mashed potatoes!" Kaden as I'm pouring cereal for breakfast: "Mom! Here's a clean spot for me to make a mess." (My suspisions are confirmed.) Kaden: "Mom I changed my mind and it's a boy. Now I just need to think of my favorite name...because Cassie is a girl name." Kaden: "MOM!!! Katelyn's turning on the water!!" (hose) Mom: "well, would you go turn it off please?" (a little annoyed that Kate figured out how to turn the hose on...) Kaden: "BUT MOM! Every TWO SECONDS she turns it on then I turn it off!" Mom: "I love you, Kaden, night night" Kaden: "I'll love you forever, mom." Melt my heart. (not really a kadenism, but too cute not to remember forever): We were going to see Curious George at the library on morning. For the event (which he was UBER excited about) Kaden donned his curious george socks, and even got me to dig out his too-small curious george shirt from when Kate was born, and his monkey backpack. He told me on the way that he "hoped that Curious George wouldn't "throw pancakes at his face," or he'll be "really mad." I assured him that wouldn't happen...but he is sure that you never know with a monkey like that. Kate-isms: At first it was cute: Katelyn will start "sing-songing" to herself.. completely wordless songs. Then Kaden will try to talk to her and she will just slowly get louder and louder as he repeats what he's saying to try to communicate to her. They will go on for about 5 minutes until she is humming at the top of her lungs and he is overly frustrated.

Busy July

I'm so glad my search bar for my internet has the "drop-down" helps... I don't think I'd be able to find my blog ever again if that failed me. Today I googled sure-jell to look up a raspberry peach freezer jam recipe. Instead I found a plethera of sites instructing me on how to use sure-jell to mask my marijuana use in a urine test. Without even opening the links, I also learned that it does not work. So, you will not find me downing a pack of sure-jell. Ever. Which might come as a relief to you. I took Katelyn out to play with her water table today while I picked raspberries (for said jam) and she lasted a whole 5 seconds until she realized Daddy was working in the garage. Daddy's tools trump anything and everything mom has to offer as far as entertainment. Every.Time. The last I posted, I had said Kaden had a trip to the dr in his near future for his hurt elbow/shoulder. (It fluctuated based on the moment.) Well, last Tuesday we did take him in. I got an appointment scheduled and Luke came home so we could all go. I needed to be there because (sorry Luke) I'm just a little more familiar with the dr and what needs to be said/done/paid/etc... (that came out nicer-sounding than I anticipated, whew) But I could not be trusted to drive/make it through the appointment without Luke due to my overdose (or close to it) of meds for my on-going allergic reaction. Thankfully, we got to see Mindy-who is actually a Physician's Assistant- for his arm. I like her...in fact, I've consistantly liked the PA's better than the Dr's at this office. She checked him out, noticing- as we had- that he was not swollen or bruised and could not seem to pinpoint WHERE it hurt. Yet, she was convinced (as were we) that he was truly in pain, even tho all outward signs pointed toward fake. She ordered xrays and we were sent to the hospital. At least it wasn't the ER this time. I, again, was thankful that Luke was with me since when we got to the x-ray department we realized that Kate would NOT be allowed back and since I am obviously pregnant, I would not be allowed back either. I am quite sure Kaden would not have gone alone. So Luke and him headed back while Kate and I waited with a few very chatty fellow waiting room-waiters. (Apparently there were 4 people all with one person..and they were outgoing.) Kate thoroughly enjoyed their attention...good thing too, because we were there about an hour. Kaden got his x-rays (elbow, shoulder, collarbone) and came back to wait. Then the nurse informed us that we needed to stay in the waiting room because the dr wanted to talk to us. She then pointed to the phone on the wall (which I hadn't noticed) and told us to answer it when it rang...it would be the doctor. That was a new experience. It took about another half hour for the Dr to call and let us know that his arm was broken. We never did see x-rays, and we still sometimes wonder if he faked it. He just doesn't seem to be in enough pain to actually have a broken arm! We were then sent back to the dr's office to get a sling and ace wrap since they didn't want to cast it for a week. That took another half hour or so. It was a long time for all of us, and I was just very glad I had brought my benedryl. Kaden was supposed to get his cast Monday, (tomorrow) but since we had long-planned a trip to his Gramma and Boppa's house we asked if it could be sooner. No, it could not. Instead they moved it back til next Friday. We went ahead and met my parents in Billings and gave them Kaden for his MUCH anticipated 5 days with them. We are sad that it will be somewhat hampered by his arm, but I think he will have a great time anyway. They called last night for some last-minute instruction on his allergy meds and he was still up at 9pm and had (after driving home from Billings) already helped them water their garden, visited Gramma Gehman and presented her with his Peach Jam present which he insisted we needed to give her, gotten the wading pool out, and eaten dinner...all in 3 hours. Needless to say, he is having a GREAT time. I am so happy for him to have this time with them. Every day last week he would ask at least once (sometimes several times) "What day is today?" and this is what the rest of the conversation would be: mom: "Monday" Kaden: "What comes after Monday?" M: "Tuesday" K: "What comes after Tuesday?" M: "Wednesday" etc... M: "Friday" K: "What comes after Friday?" M: "Saturday" K: "AND I GET TO GO TO GRAMMA AND BOPPA'S!!!!" I would think he should know his days of the week in order by now.... Katelyn is doing JUST FINE without her partner in crime, so far. Granted, it's only been a day. She is very much enjoying being the center of attention and being silly to get said attention. Today at breakfast I heard myself saying, "Stop teasing her".... (pause for 5 seconds).... "she's trying to eat, stop. Leave her alone..." when I realized. "WAIT! IS KADEN HERE??? NO!!! WHY am I having to say these things???" Luke just shrugged. He had wasted no time picking up where Kaden left off. LOL! HOW is it already so far into July? And is it really possible that when I see my little boy again he will be FOUR!? I have a party to plan, cooking club, babysitting night, speech therapy for Kate and several other things to do as well before Thursday. We have 10 weeks until this baby is due... at the rate things are going that will feel like tomorrow! I'm really not sure I'm ready for labor.. bring on the rest of it! Someday I will post more Kadenisms. And Kate is talking just enough that we might even get to include her soon!

House of needies...

So, in my last post I neglected to mention that Kaden hurt his arm the same day I was at the ER for my hives. My first thought as he was screaming that he hurt himself falling off the couch was "if we have to make another trip to the ER I'm going to just die." We did not take him to the ER because after further inspection of his arm and asking him some questions we quickly came to the conclusion that he had over extended it. Nothing broken, nothing too terrrible. It was also right at bedtime, so we didn't know how much of the meltdown was truly his arm, and how much was just he needed some sleep. Although, he cried enough that we did know it wasn't totally just from being tired. Now that it's been a few days we are realizing that in the process of falling off the couch and over-extending his elbow, he also messed up his shoulder. It took us this long to figure that out mostly because he IS milking his "broken arm" (as he calls it) to the point of ridiculous. He wouldn't even open the door the other day til we MADE him. As if his right arm isn't perfectly fine...he would be perfectly happy to whine about everything and make us do everything for him. He cries when we even lift him under his armpits. And today I asked him to raise his arm above his head. He refused to even try it alone, so he used his good hand to lift it (ever so slowly) above his head. Then i told him to hold it there and let go. He tried and I could see in him that he wasn't faking as it shook and felt to his side. I could tell he had tried, and he was in tears at the end. I guess we'll head to the dr soon. The problem is, I don't trust myself under the influence of benedryl for the first 2ish hours... which leaves about a 1 hour window where I don't have the hives making me crazy or the benedryl making me sleep. How do you schedule an appt in that time frame??? bad timing, Kaden...bad bad timing! Poor Luke has gotten the brunt of taking care of this sad household full of needy people. He's done such a good job, but I can see it taking a toll on him too. We have date night tomorrow... I'm not sure we'll actually go on a date, but it'll be a good time to not have kids and just BE. And maybe my hives will be gone by then?

The month of June in a not-so-short nutshell

I just came here to update the blog and found a draft I'd never published. At least I have less to remember than I thought I did! Over the weekend of June 9-10, Luke went up to Montana for his parents 40th anniversary party. He left here saturday morning and got there about 5pm-in time for dinner with his parents and sister's family. He then stayed til about 4:30pm the next day and headed back to Gillette. So, he was there less than 24 hours... he was a tired guy when he got back. He was able to bring several coolers of much needed meat from both sets of parents, and some hand-me-down clothes from his sister, and some SAMS Club necessities while he was at it. Did I mention it was a BUSY 23 hours there? I don't remember a whole lot of what we had going on between then and now except VBS. This year I Co-directed VBS with a friend from church. She had a ton going on, so I think we both felt like VBS got a teensy bit overlooked...and it started to stress me out toward the end. I finally decided to just pray and let God know how I was feeling and purposely put my trust in Him to provide what was needed. I felt a lot better then and during the week of VBS God definitely made that provision! VBS started on Sunday the 24th... also, I ended up with a 18-20lb box of peaches that were NOT going to last another day. So after church Luke and I spent 4 hours washing, peeling, and finely chopping (in the food processor) all the peaches except about 8 which we saved to eat. We made 3 batches of freezer jam, then ran out of jars, sure-gel, and sugar. So I froze the remaining puree for another jam making session, maybe when the weather cools a bit! (it was over 100 the day I was doing this!) Then I left at 4 to head to the church to finish up setting up for VBS. It was a crazy night between setting up, registering all the kids (75 average), and making sure the volunteers for each age group and session had enough help. That night we had 14 four-year-old boys and 2 4-year-old girls. I was feeling bad for those teachers! BUT, at the end of the week when we did our "best behaved" awards it turned out that the nominees for that prize were 3 boys out of that group! I have nothing to say but GOOD about how VBS went. Each night we had exactly the help we needed, plenty of snacks and crafts prepared, and a great bunch of kids. I didn't even have to get up on stage and threaten them wiht "I'm NOT a nice person, and you DON'T want to come sit with me if you're naughty." Like last year! The downside to the week was that on the Friday before I had my normal OB appointment and had been having a LOT of contractions. Too many for my OB to be comfortable with. She thought they were due to a(nother) UTI and prescribed Macrobid (again). On Tuesday, when the contractions had only worsened, I called and they decided they needed to see me Thursday since it turned out I never did have the UTI. I went in on Thursday and they just did a few things to make sure I was not having pre-term labor and dilating or anything serious. They stopped my macrobid and once again it looked like I had a UTI. The very next morning I woke up with hives on my face and back of my arms. I searched high and low for benedryl (i have a history over very BAD allergic reactions when i have them...usually to bugs/spiders) and could find none but childrens. (Can we say "gross tasting"?) I called my dr, who said she thought it was probably an allergic reaction to macrobid and told me to take 25mg of benedryl every 8 hours. (That is less than half a normal dose, because of my pregnancy.) I did that all and thankfully Luke's jobsite had no contractors for the day so he was able to come home early to help me with kids through my benedryl fog. By that evening my hands were swollen to the point of "can't even make a fist" and raging with pain. The hives were everywhere. We called a doctor friend from the church who said to up the benedryl to 50mg every 6 hours, so we did that for the night. Somehow, miraculously, I slept fairly well all night...as long as I didn't try to graps my pillow or anything, and took my benedryl a half hour before i was supposed to. But when I got up in the morning it was BAAAAAAAD (as if it weren't already bad!) I was swollen from my fingertips half way up my arms, and my whole sides were one big hive, not to mention everywhere else. By this time I had tried the home remedies- oatmeal bath, baking soda bath, cold showers...I was willing to try ANYTHING. as I got out of yet another 30 second cold shower (which, by the way, does help the itching for a few minutes when your desperate) and looked at my fingers which were completely blue. Luke saw my eyes which were totally swollen and purple... that's when I realized we have to do more than benedryl! Even the insides of my ears were burning! So we called a friend to watch the kids and tried to decide between walk-in clinic or ER. At that point I had not felt the baby move in quite some time, and my contractions were totally gone. Our dr friend from church told us that at the walk in they would have to send us to either ER or OB floor of hospital if they were worried about the baby, so we opted to just start at the ER. I'm so glad we did. They got me right in (weird!) and the dr came to see me within a few minutes. He gave me some steroids and a prescription for more steroids and upped my benedryl again. By that time I had swollen up to almost my elbow and the hives had gotten worse (who knew they even COULD!) I was getting pretty depressed and wondering how bad could it GET? They checked baby's heartbeat- which was normal- and wouldn't you know it that about one minute later the baby decided to kick and squirm. (Isn't that always the case?) I guess we could ahve done the walkin clinic, but I don't care because we got treated so well at the ER. Also the ER doctor was able to call my OB dr to confer with her about his prescriptions, and checked my labs (that i'd done thursday) to make sure something major hadn't turned up. Thankfully, NOTHING. We are not 100% sure, but are being told to assume I am severly allergic to macrobid, which was probably what was causing the preterm labor and i had other symptoms of allergy that I hadn't noticed. (Like, feet hurting at night.... isn't that just pregnancy??? altho, the "pain" was a very weird sensation, not a normal achy feeling.) So here I am..able to type, and the swelling is back down to mostly just my hands (hence the reason I can even type, albeit a little uncomfortable!). About 5 hours after the steroids were in my system my hives were dissapearing almost as fast as they had come. I can still feel that I'm having the reaction, but am so thankful for the steroids taking the edge off! The pharmacist told us to expect a 3 day recovery. Let's just say I will never forget to tell a dr I'm allergic to Macrobid. And I'm so thankful it didn't turn into a breathing crisis (which I've had with bug/bees/spiders). All that to say, VBS week has sure been a full week! Oh, did i mention it was upper 90s and 100s for the week? This week I am looking forward to date night on Tuesday (we are now rotating date-night babysitting with 2 other families) and Luke having Wednesday off for the 4th. Then next Saturday we will meet my parents in Billings with Kaden so he can go spend 4ish days with my parents. THey will bring him back on his birthday (the 12th). I'll miss him a lot, but it will be fun to have a little extra one on one time with my Katelyn-girl. And make it easier to get his birthday party planned! So, I'm 29 weeks pregnant now...and hoping this was the most exciting week of pregnancy. Luke and I were joking while at the ER that it seems I only know how to do things in extremes: help in MOPS? why not co-coordinate, allergic reacion? the worse the better! baking bread? Why not do 8 loaves and freeze some? you know... I guess that's just me. Tomorrow is July 1 and I can't believe it!

june 8, 2012

I can never remember how far along I am. I finally wrote the weeks on my calendar so I at least have somewhere to go look! How different from the first time around!!!! Tomorrow morning Luke leaves for Montana for his parents 40th wedding anniversary party. It will be a long QUICK trip, which is why the kids and I are opting to stay home. During the summer Luke is very discouraged from taking time off work by his company (not that it seems to stop the other employees, but that doesn't mean Luke wants to be that kind of employee.) Anyway, so he will be leaving in the morning nad hopefully make it there by dinnertime (with one stop for us in Billings...when you live 2 hours from anything you HAVE to make use of the time you are in a city!). He will get to spend the evening with his family and then go to church (his dad is a pastor) in the morning. The party is at 1:30pm and he'll be headed home as soon as that is over. I wish it was not during the summer and that we could make a trip out of it, but I guess that's how life goes. Meanwhile, the kids and I plan to hold down the fort at home. We do have to get our bountiful basket at 10am and thats about our only plans! We are going to make the most of the weekend, even if daddy is gone! Life has been a little less hectic lately, but, interestingly enough, I actually feel more stressed. We have been playing outside a LOT and having a lot of friends over during the day. It's been so fun. I am co-directing VBS with another gal, and that has been a little different than last year. It seems to be coming together, but as always, I'll be glad when it's over! I am starting to hit that "third trimester fatigue" that I've actually never had in previous pregnancies...but now I am experiencing. By evening I'm usually totally wiped. I'm sure part of that has to do with being outside in the mid-80s for several hours a day!

just some more of life in general....

Yesterday someone told me they could tell I'd been outside a lot. Yes, on May 9th I was complimented on my start of a tan. I hadn't even noticed! Probably because I'm noticing my BELLY. Am I SURE I'm not 30 weeks preggo? Yes, and no. Nope. No pictures for curious minds. The house across from us (next to the one that I complained about last summer getting resided, light GRAY..yuck) well the house next to THAT is getting resided...light green. Seriously. First of all, OUR house just got resided and is (a good version of) green. So why would you choose green? Second...LIGHT green? These people aren't even old! It does make me wonder if smoking affects you more than the general surgeon is letting on. Also, maybe my idea of "acceptable house colors" is completely off. Who knows. Today I watched a couple extra kids and it was warm out. So we broke out the water table and eventually remembered the sunscreen..and eventually ended up with a kitchen towel bandana'd around the little girls head since it's still mostly bald. All in all, the kids spent about 3 hours outside and I didn't have to do anything besides make them lunch :) I sat in my camp chair and looked at recipe books (and sweated). I haven't done that since I can remember (the recipe book part. Well, maybe the sweat part too. sadly). I now have a half page of desserts I want to try. (Maybe this is why I seem to be 30 weeks pregnant-looking?) Lately (as in this week) I've felt so much energy. I've spent many naptimes DOING rather than recovering from the morning. I've baked, and baked, and well, basically avoided cleaning...but at least I've been busy/productive during that time. There were some days I wondered if I would ever be productive again. I'm not making promises though... this week could be the one and only. Today I cleaned up the kids room/closet (isn't that what I'm always doing when I clean? maybe because it's the least of evils of cleaning...) These kids are lucky I can't find my camera, or I'd have taken pictures of every toy to sell on the Upcycle facebook site. Well..maybe not EVERY toy. I had a movie on for Kaden (I've been having him not nap as he wakes up SO early every morning.) He fell asleep to the movie..which is fine, I figure if he needs the sleep he will fall asleep to the movie. Kate has been sleeping for almost 3 hours. That's about all I can think of. The last 10 days (since I last blogged) have been busy, but not overly exciting. Oh, Kaden does have swollen eyes..since Sunday. We are trying allergy meds (doesn't seem to be working) and the dr prescribed antibiotics just in case it's pink eye. I doubt it's pink eye. I hope not, since we've been fairly social... OH! And I'm done babysitting. D-O-N-E. Done with a capital D. DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I enjoyed it while it lasted (well, maybe up until one month before..) but I'm ready to be done. i think it has to do with the nice weather... and wanting to enjoy a summer without a baby around. I'm so enjoying how Kaden and Kate can play and play and play outside with minimal neediness. I wasn't going to quit til June 1...but it just worked out different than expected so I'm done as of last week. I had my last MOPS leadership meeting yesterday for the year...it was a bittersweet ending. I drove away thinking "wow, I'm really not doing this again next year" and was sad to not have that tie with those people, but happy that I won't be as busy. Apparently some women at my church are planning to start a similar group at my church, but I don't think I'll be involved with that either. I plan to fill my time with my new baby (and my other kids..haha) and playdates, and more 'important" things (in my priority list anyway). Well, it's time for me to go clean the kitchen a little more (you'd never know I mopped just yesterday) and get the living room picked up. If I find my camera you might want to check my facebook if you're interested in kids toys... just sayin'.

April FLEW by!

Wow... it's been a whirlwind weekend. and month. and life...really! For Easter we had some friends over and celebrated mid-afternoon with a ham feast and easter egg hunt for the kids. It was a really fun day.

From there we really don't know what's kept us so busy but somehow it has been! Somewhere in there we headed to Rapid City and ended up with a Toyota Sienna van. It's the Extra Luxury Edition. Yep.. I think it's awesome...even if it is a minivan. We've had some beautiful days this month and spent time playing outside in the water. Kaden learned to ride his bike with training wheels and was OH so proud to ride it to the park for the first time. I doubt we will go to a park without it now! Kate graduated from stroller to wagon for our park trips. She just climbs around in the stroller so I realized a wagon is much more suited for her! The kids also got to go to their first circus! The elephants were the favorite (possibly because they peed and pooped for them), and they also loved the tigers and cotten candy.

Kaden also got to meet Curious George. You should have seen his excitement! He found every monkey think he had to wear... then he frowned when George came in. He told me George is NOT that big, and he knew it was the real George. Oh well, he still loved it!

Friday (27th) was a day full of happy and sad. In the morning we had our 20 week ultrasound! We found out our baby is totally healthy and the amniotic fluids levels (the worry of this pregnancy)are GREAT. We don't have to have another ultrasound for that until 32 weeks! (What, 12 weeks without an ultrasound? the most we've gone so far is 4!) We also decided not to find out if this baby is a boy or a girl. I am so excited for the surprise. I think Luke is just willing... he'd sure love to know. I kind of think its a boy because the baby is already measuring a week older and is in the 90th percentile. (Following his/her brother, Kaden!!!) Friday was also a sad day when Allison moved out. We were all sad to see her go, especially the kids. Katelyn even through herself on the floor and wailed and cried. We miss her, and were glad to get to share our home with her. It is weird to go back to "normal". Thankfully, we had a busy weekend to distract kids from the sadness. On Saturday Kate turned 2. We spent the day cleaning and cleaning...and cleaning. And making potato salad, and marshmallow fondant, and cakes. That evening my parents came and the kids were so thrilled to see them. It had been since Christmas! On Sunday, the kids and Luke and Boppa went to church while my mom and I made the cakes and wrapped presents. The cakes were the easiest I've ever done, and I kind of think I'm hooked on fondant!!! I made the marshmallow fondant, so it even tasted good. My dad said he likes it better than frosting. I loved how it turned out..and Katelyn seemed to enjoy it too!

We had cake and ice cream first at 3:30pm-right after naps! Then we opened presents and played. Around 5:30pm we had polish dogs, hamburgers, potato salad and chips. It was a fun celebration. We got her a water table, but I don't even have a picture!

Pregnant and telling. (this is because I now know I will never remember this stuff)

Yesterday I turned 16 weeks pregnant. This pregnancy has definitely been the easiest so far (and I'm hoping that doesn't mean hardest baby!) It has been a lot easier to be excited for the baby instead of just "making it" through the day..the nausea, etc.. Both Luke and I feel like this is the most excited we've been. I think we always knew we'd have 2 kids...but this one is the kid we never PLANNED on having. I mean, yes, the pregnancy was planned...no surprises here...but it wasn't one we always knew we'd have. We haven't always pictured 3 little rascals in our lives.

Some of the things that stick in my mind lately are the THREE ultrasounds I've had in only 7 weeks. The first at 9ish weeks showed a giant bean with a heartbeat...and proved there was only 1 baby with a due date of Sept 12ish. The second at 13ish weeks showed that the bean had grown into a full fledged baby. It was so fun to see how much could change in a little over 3 weeks. I have a picture of just baby's feet in that ultrasound. They are about the size of a pencil eraser. The third ultrasound was yeterday at exactly 16 weeks. It was truly amazing how much bigger the baby was and how differently it moved. We could see it's spine and ribs, both chambers of the heart beating, and baby kept flipping around...proving that I DO feel baby inside me this early! It's been such a fun progression to see this baby so often and it has been truly mind boggeling (to put it nicely) to know that people kill babies at these stages.

I started feeling the baby flutter around last week, around 15 weeks along. Lately the flutters turned to kicks..and yesterday, at exactly 16 weeks, I felt a kick from the outside. I was SO shocked. I was just laying on the couch after a very busy long day, and the baby started kicking, so I put my fingers on the spot and started poking. Right then it just kicked my fingers right there...as obvious as could be. In the middle of my sentance I just went "WHOA! The baby just kicked me!" and do you think it would do it again for Luke?

I did get a stomach virus at 15 weeks and it lasted a LONG time. I never threw up (I'm crediting the nausea pills for that) but I wanted to. I almost think it was worse to not be able to. It felt like a brick in my stomach while sick. It caused heartburn like I've never had, and was truly miserable. Adding to that, it was the days we were traveling... So, that makes pregnancy #3 to get the flu in. I had been hoping to avoid it.

Now that I'm officially well again, I have decided to cut my nausea medicine down to 1/2 pill. I'm on day 2 and I seem to be doing ok. I do feel nausea throughout the day, but it is doable. I am anxious to be off all meds, and have the side affects gone too. However, I did start a acid reflux medicine, so I'm not sure how successful I will be at going off all meds. I'm just taking it a day at a time, and determined that I will do what it takes to feel ok for the sake of everyone in this family! (Within reason and limits, of course.)

I can't believe I'm already 16 weeks. I find out what I'm having within the next month (not sure when...) I do feel like I am having a boy. In fact, I am pretty convinced. I tell myself all the time that people are always wrong, so I somewhat expect to be! I feel like it is a boy because this pregnancy is so similar to Kaden's. I feel the kicks so much sooner (compared to Kate's) and am carrying so high that I can wear regular jeans even though I look fairly pregnant. It's all the little things that lead me to believe it's a boy. But I will be just as happy if it's a girl...maybe just a little more surprised! Yesterday at the ultrasound the nurse asked if I knew what I was having yet (at the Resource Center they are not allowed to tell) and then kept saying "he" then correcting herself... "err..or her." Since I already feel like I am having a boy, this didn't help unconvince me. Time will tell! And we'll see if I'm right! Like I said, either way is totally fine with me :)

What a ride. I'm still having trouble believing that I'm pregnant with #3. Where has time gone?! How old am I? and (some days) WHAT WAS I THINKING?

But I'm so excited. so very excited.

Arkansas and beyond

So, we're in Sams in Rapid City yesterday on our last leg of the trip home from Arkansas when Kaden just randomly walks up to the older lady serving samples and says "Last night I threw up in my bed." She was a little taken aback. He never even realized she was serving FOOD (if you know Kaden, that's amazing) No, he was too focused on the fact that he was telling her about throwing up in his bed last night (which was actually at least 2 weeks ago.) I don't know what brought it to his head. I did make him tell her that it was a long time ago and he was better now. She seemed to feel better after that. (Get this sick kid out of here!)

I asked him what his favorite part of the trip was. "Playing trains in the car." Really, kid? Really?? I'm deciding to believe that he thinks "trip" means only the car part. Surely his favorite part of the last 10 days was NOT the car. Or maybe it was and he had a better time than all of us.

It was a great trip! We left early on Friday the 16th. I don't even remember what time. All I remember is getting up and being so tired. I went to take a shower but first got on the scale... I saw 69.2lbs but read it as 169.2. I FREAKED. Oh my word. I mean, I knew I was pregnant and all, but it would be unhealthy to gain that much weight in the ENTIRE pregnancy, much less the first 15 weeks. I got on the scale. Off. Back on. Off.. back on. Finally realized there was no 1. And also put it together that I did NOT weigh only 69.2lbs. WHEW. I got in the shower and made a new rule that I am not allowed on the scale before a reasonable hour in the morning. Also, a mental note to get a new battery.
Anyway, back to the trip. With losing an hour through South Dakota, and eating lunch and dinner in parks along the way, we arrived in Omaha at some friends' house around 7pm. The next day felt longer but was actually like 120 miles shorter... and we made it their around 5pm (if i remember right)
During the stay we shopped, visited with old college friends, made a lot of food, saw a lot of pretty nature including Lost Valley and the hike there, and I got sick. Yep. I have never been able to visit this group of people without being sick at some point. This makes the 4th time... I'm not sure I want to see them again! (kidding!) At first I thought it was just pregnancy, but the longer it went on and the worse it got I realized, nope, I'm sick. I kept taking my nausea pills, which just changed the "bad" I felt. We didn't know if we'd be able to leave on Friday like we planned, but I bucked up and packed up and we left. Miserable car ride. By the end of that day I was pretty much over the sick part, but still felt terrible from the remaining heartburn, and side affects thanks to pregnancy. Poor Luke had to deal with me sick and the kids and drive the whole time...
Saturday we spent the day with yet another college friend. We visited Grace to see all the changes, and basically just hung out since between us there was almost always one kid napping! It was so fun to catch up with old friends and remember life before. (Was there life before kids?) We left around 4:30pm to head to Mitchel SD. I had really wanted to stop at Fazoli's but after being so sick and still feeling somewhat horrible I decided not to bother. That means on this whole trip I made it to Sonic once (on the day i was sick, and didn't drink it all, or even enjoy any of it) and didn't make it to Fazolis. I don't feel as let down as I would have thought if you'd warned me I wouldn't make it.

We're home now. We got home Sunday around 2pm. Unpacked. Put away Sams food. Made dinner, and went to the church business meeting, and I was in bed at like 8:15 (keep in mind it was 9:15pm where I came from!) I was so tired. It was a good trip, but it's always good to be home. Even if there are piles and piles of laundry.

Oh did I mention it poured rain? Most of the time we were there. Oh no, not while we were driving, no, then it was sunny and HOT. It rained while we were there...while back home it was like 73. Hows that for backwards. We commented on the way home how it was weird that in the entire 10 day trip we had not seen ANY snow. Not even a little. We couldn't have planned better for March in our end of the country... Arkansas, however, could have held off on the rain.

Kaden started the vacation with antibiotics for a double ear infection. Having never had one (that I knew of) I didn't realize with ear infections came the possibility of hearing loss. Let's just say for a day or 2 we just thought he was being REALLY rebellious, until we realized he wasn't hearing well. It was amazing how quiet and timid he seemed because of it. We figured out it was because he wasn't hearing almost any of the conversation so he just sat there, lost in his own world. People commented on how he didn't seem as outgoing as we always say he is. Yes, by about day 5 he was back to hearing, and back to his normal talkative, inquisitive self. It was SO sad to see him not hearing.

So there's the nutshell of our vacation. It was affordable and fun...and maybe someday we'll feel like we can afford a cruise or true vacation spot. For now, we'll enjoy what we're doing. Afterall, the grass is always greener where you water it. Oh and I have to mention how WELL Kaden and Kate did in the car. There was virtually no crying (altho, i do remember about 20 minutes from Kate at one point...other than that it was just momentary needs...the crying was easy to end...) They did so well. They never complained or fought getting in the car...and they were mostly nice to each other and me.

Now begins the craziness that is our week. Today I begin physical therapy for my hip/tailbone/who knows what it is pain. I have to miss my Bible Study which just makes me grumpy. Then I need to go to Walmart and have a veggie tray made for a girls night with some friends. We're doing a mystery murder dinner party. It will be fun, even if i do have to dress like a man soccer player (with a pregnant belly?). Not the point. That party's at 6pm. Somewhere in there I am meeting with a lady from church to finalize plans for the Progressive Dinner we're planning for the young couples at church. Oh, and hopefully I'll have a new phone???

Tomorrow I have Roslyn for 6 hours and Bible Study, and hopefully I can be caught up on laundry and make a lasagna for this weekend;s Progressive dinner. That's when i need to do all my little chores, like paying bills, taking care of the pile of mail, and catching up on the phone calls I need to make.

Wednesday I have a playdate/bible study for most of the morning, model ultrasound for the Women's resource center, and dinner by 5pm so we can get the boy to AWANA on time. Maybe during Awana I can get my Walmart shopping done.

Thursday I have Roslyn again for 6 hours and hopefully somewhat of a down day. As down as it can be with an extra kid who crawls now....

Friday is usually my down day, but between the birthday party Kaden is invited to (at these ages, it's moms and siblings too) and getting ready for the Progressive Dinner and Craft Day I think I'll be pretty busy.

Saturday is Craft Day, which I lead at our church, from 9-4pm. Then the Progressive Dinner is sometime that evening (is it bad that I don't know the time?) and we have some friends moving to town, so we'll drop whatever and go help them unpack when we can (which might mean i skip on the dinner, or have kids at craft day!). I'd also like to have prepped a meal so we can have those friends over for dinner a couple times this week as they settle in.

I just hope no one else gets sick... not this week!